Indistractible: the skill of the future

Indistractible

Wherever you walk, transit or rest, it is normal to see people immersed in their cell phones.  Normal... Normal? No, I don't think so.  I see how our lives are diluted between social networks, video games, YouTube and more.

Have you ever missed out on unforgettable moments with your loved ones or others by paying too much attention to your phone notifications?

To me yes.  A look of love or the happy face of my niece when she floats after her first dive without floats in the pool.  A pirouette in the air by one of my cats playing with my dog ​​in the garden. Unrepeatable.

For some time now I have been trying to concentrate 100% on what I am doing, even if it is just 2 quality minutes, but it is difficult to achieve this due to the endless distractions we are subjected to from the time we get up until we go to bed.   

Journalist Nir Eyal has already mentioned this and is the author of the book Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life.  In fact, he has worked with tech companies to build products that would keep customers engaged, through creating healthy habits like going to the gym and eating a healthy diet, but he realized that some products were too enticing for people.

I don't know if you have asked yourself about the role that technology is playing today.  Something that was sold to us as a tool to make things easier for us has invaded us to the point of persuading us  that what comes from there contains everything that makes up and needs our life.  And to top it all off, they connect us to everything.

But as Mr. Eyal says, while distractions aren't necessarily your fault, they are your responsibility.

It's time to equip ourselves to control distractions

According to the American Dictionary of Psychology, distraction is “the process of interrupting attention” and “a stimulus or task that diverts attention from the focus of interest.”  In other words, distractions divert us from what we want to do, whether it's accomplishing or completing a job, enjoying time with a loved one, or doing something for our own benefit.

If distraction becomes a habit, it will become increasingly difficult to maintain the concentration required for creativity in both our professional and personal lives .  What's more, if we constantly withdraw from family and friends because of these distractions, we miss the opportunity to cultivate the relationships we need for our personal well-being.

Digital distraction can manifest itself as being constantly checking notifications on your phone, even while you are chatting with family, friends or colleagues, and interrupting your concentration just to check an email.  It can also occur when coworkers pop in to chat while you're trying to get work done in a focused manner;  or when you end up checking all the news on social media after having initially planned to read a book, for example.

The opposite of “distraction” is “concentration.”  Concentration is the action that takes us to what we truly want, where we want to put all our attention. Concentration is action with purpose.

Any action, whether it's working on a project, getting enough sleep, exercising, eating healthier, taking time to pray or meditate, or spending more time with loved ones would be forms of focus if you're doing it consciously.  Concentration is doing what you say you are going to do.

What makes us distracted or focused?

According to Mr. Eyal, all human behavior is guided by internal or external triggers.

External triggers are signals coming from the environment in which we move and tell us what to do next.  These can be notifications with a bell indicating the arrival of an email or a message on WhatsApp.  Competition for our attention can also come from a person, such as when a coworker interrupts you.  Even the television can be a trigger by its mere presence, and the telephone is even more so.

Internal triggers are signals that come from within us.  If we are hungry, it guides us to look for something to eat; if we are cold, it guides us to put on a coat.  If we are stressed or lonely, this guides us to call a friend.  Even the desire to feel pleasure is itself a state of uncomfortable anxiety.  Internal triggers are negative feelings.

Because all behavior is induced by either internal or external triggers, both the action of what we intend to do (concentration) and the one that diverts us from the purpose (distraction) originate from those same two sources:  internal and external triggers.

Is the world doomed to distraction?

There are those who suggest that a “dark order” lurks behind all these applications, fashion, showbiz, Hollywood to prevent us from concentrating on our reality.  It's like we're nullifying ourselves and moving on to living from the couch what they show us in movies, videos, video games and social networks.

But in principle, you are not doomed if you become aware and relearn to concentrate.  Nir Eyal suggests several steps to achieve this.

1. Control internal triggers

To overcome distractions you need to understand what triggers behaviors like what makes you compulsively check your phone or read another email.

The root of all human behavior is the desire to escape discomfort.  Even when we think we are seeking pleasure, we are, in fact, guided by the desire to be free from pain or longing.

The truth is that we abuse the use of video games, social networks and cell phones not only for the pleasure they bring but because they free us from psychological discomfort . (highlighted by the author)

Distraction is then an unhealthy (harmful) evasion of negative feelings.  But once you try to recognize the role that internal triggers like boredom, loneliness, insecurity, tiredness and uncertainty play in your life, you can decide how to respond in a healthier way.  You may not be able to control how you feel, but you can learn how to react to what you are feeling.

To start, you can try changing the way you think about the negative feelings that lead to distraction.

The thing is, scientific studies show that not giving in to internal triggers can backfire.  Resisting a craving or desire can lead to anxiety that only makes the desire increase.  Once it has given in, relieving the tension of anxiety increases the reward, reinforcing the bad habit.  However, there are ways to cope with discomfort.

Dr. Jonathan Bricker of the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle, USA, has developed several alternatives to use when faced with temptation.  to distraction.  Their techniques allow patients to reduce health risks through behavioral changes.

1. Identify the feeling or thought behind what you want.  When you find yourself on the verge of getting distracted, look for the internal trigger that is causing you to do so.  You are feeling anxious, restless, or perhaps not well prepared for work…
2. Dr. Bricker recommends writing down what you're feeling, along with the time that feeling occurs and what you're doing when that internal trigger arises.  Keeping a “diary” of your distractions can help you link behaviors to internal triggers.  The more acute you become at detecting the thoughts and feelings that precede certain behaviors, the more adept you will become at controlling them over time.
3. Explore the feeling:  Dr. Bricker advises being aware of the sensation that precedes distraction.  Do you feel a current in your stomach? Or pressure in your chest? The recommendation is to stay with that sensation before following your impulse.  In fact, Dr. Bricker suggests the leaves-by-the-river method:  Imagine that you are standing next to a river where fallen leaves from the trees float by.  Put every negative thought and feeling in your mind onto each sheet of paper and watch the river carry them away.

2. Give yourself time to concentrate

If you don't schedule your day during these times, someone else will do it for you.  When you don't know what you want to do with your time, anything is a potential distraction.  Nir Eyal  He recommends that in order to give time to things that really deserve it, you follow these steps.

1. Don't choose your purposes, choose your values.  Values ​​are the attributes of the person you want to become.  Some examples of values ​​might be being a contributing member of a team, a loving parent, being part of an equitable marriage, seeking wisdom, taking care of your physical health, or being a generous friend.  Only you can decide which values ​​are important to you.
2. Convert your values ​​into time:  Many people talk a lot about what is important to them (health, family, friends).  But when it comes time to invest time in these areas of their lives, they dissipate and are inconsistent.  These people are not consistent with their values ​​because they do not dedicate time of their day to them.
3. Block your schedule:  The most effective way to ensure that you will set aside time for your values ​​is to block out those minutes, hours that you want to dedicate to them.  Blocking your schedule means deciding what you are going to do and when you are going to do it.  The goal is to create a template to map out how you will use your time in the day, eliminating white space in your schedule.

It doesn't really matter what you do, as long as you do what you programmed.  Check your social media if you want, but at a set time, not while you're scheduled to do something else like spend quality time with your family.

Decide how much time you want to dedicate to each area of ​​your life, based on your values.  Make sure you have scheduled enough time for yourself and your relationships.  After all, the most important people in your life deserve a little more than the day's leftovers.

You can create a template to schedule what your perfect week would look like and see how it works out for you. These are just examples of the different strategies you can create to improve your quality of life.

3.  Identify external triggers and counterattack

Technology companies use external triggers to attract attention.  Notification chimes and tones on our devices often distract us from what we want to focus our attention on.  We can try to ignore these triggers, but scientific research shows that ignoring a call or text can be just as distracting as answering it.

However, not all external triggers are distractions. If they are used to achieve a job, a goal, these external triggers can remind us of what we have planned.  The right thing to do is to ask yourself if the external trigger is truly useful to you or if you are rather subject to it.  If the signal leads you to focus, stick to it.  If it leads to distraction, eliminate it.

External triggers are everywhere and as you may have guessed, one of the most problematic sources of triggers is the cell phone.  Whether it's keeping in touch with family, navigating around town or listening to audiobooks, this miraculous pocket gadget has become indispensable.

Although your cell phone is a major source of distraction, you can regain control by following these steps:

• Remove:  uninstall applications that you no longer need.
• Replace:  determine where and when you use distracting apps like social media and YouTube.  Move these apps to your console and remove them from your phone, for example.
• Reorder: Move any app that might cause you to constantly check it unconsciously from your phone's home screen.
• Recover: Adjust notification settings for each app to ensure you only receive notifications from the absolutely important apps.

Be sure to counter external triggers in other fields, both online and offline.  Whether the external trigger comes from a notification on your phone or computer, or from a coworker distracting you when you were trying to concentrate on work.  The consequences are the same.

4. Prevent distraction with agreements

Finally, the last step to becoming indistractable that Nir Eyal recommends is using pacts.  This technique involves making a “pre-commitment” in order to overcome a distraction.

There are 3 types of pacts

An effort pact is a type of pre-commitment that involves increasing the amount of effort required to do something you do not want to do.  Adding extra effort forces you to ask yourself if a distraction is really worth that extra effort.  There are several apps that allow you to make effort pacts with your digital devices such as Forest, Freedom and more.  These are external triggers, but they are there to help you, not enslave you.

The price agreement that works with money.  If you stay in your focused behavior you keep your money.  If you are distracted, you will be fined and lose your money.  It is the kind of pact that helps people to stop smoking, for example.

The identity pact is another way to change your reaction to distractions.  Your self-image has a huge impact on your behavior.  By taking on a new identity, you empower yourself to make decisions as the person you are pretending to be.  For example, I feel like I've been very distant from my sister lately.  This week I'm putting on my good sister outfit and trying to do things that bring us closer together: spending quality time together, calling her, or at least writing to her every day to see how she's doing, etc.

To become an indistractible person, you must stop telling yourself that you are a “poor attention span” or that you have an “addictive personality.”  Instead, tell yourself, “I am indistractable.”  Believe me, whatever you consciously tell yourself, becomes reality.

Task

Eyal provides us with valuable information that gives us the keys to staying focused: follow the steps mentioned above;  control your internal triggers, set aside time for focus, counteract external triggers, and prevent distractions with pacts.  All this to help us focus and reflect on what is truly valuable to us.

The world is dividing into two types of people:  those who let their attention and lives be manipulated by others, and those who can be called indistractible.  When you become indistractable, you can influence others to be indistractible too.  You can influence your friends and colleagues to try these techniques.  Inspire your loved ones and family to take the next steps  to live the life they project.  Can  help your children learn what Eyal calls the skill of the century:  become indistractable.